When Grief Doesn´t Go Away

We are capable of living a satisfactory life despite all the losses we face, because we are prepared to experience some degree of emotional distress. Losing something or someone you care about is always painful. It´s how we are able to embrace the painful experience, that will determine the amount of suffering and grieve we experience. However, each individual face losses differently.

We encounter a great number of losses through life. Losing a toy, a pet, a friendship, a family member; losing a dream, a relationship, health, mobility, the family home; changing the residence, the job; experiencing changes in financial status, facing a separation, are part of the difficulties that we encounter in life. We know the more significant the loss is, the more intense the pain. Experiencing an important loss, illness, experiencing a miscarriage or losing the sense of safety after a traumatic event may lead us to grieve.

Grieve is an individual process that puts together difficult emotions. All of us suffer and grieve differently and there is no right or wrong way to approach it. We experience the loss in a way or another as a result of a combination of factors among which we can find the type of loss, our personality, our coping styles and the number of losses you have already experienced. Remember, there are no adequate or inadequate approaches to grief, and all of them are a processes that take time.

If you´ve had a great loss and are experiencing feelings of unbearable sadness, profound loneliness or emptiness, feeling scared, experiencing crying outbursts or gross despair keep in mind that you are probably experiencing normal reactions to a situation that is abnormal to you. Although, you may need time to move on, your pain will not disappear with time, nor pretending to ignore it. You need to deal with your pain. Reach out for someone to share you grieve with.  Sharing the experience with those who are suffering the same loss may help, but remember that everyone experience grief differently.

Avoid grieving alone. Reach out to others. Finding support is of great importance for the healing process. Tell others what you need. Healing might start while receiving support from others. However, if your pain becomes unbearable, and being accompanied does not feel enough, call a therapist to help you. It seems particularly important to get in contact with a specialist if you are experiencing physical difficulties, such as important changes in your sleep, eating or hygienic habits. If aches, pains, nausea or even fatigue appear look for some who can provide some understanding to all these symptoms.

This post is also available in: Spanish

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